ripping out my eyelashes. i am not feeling good. my belly is sore like i have been vomiting, but i haven't. i am feeling kind of invalidated and used. i am used to being used. but being invalidated makes me feel like growing another foot and spitting on the tops of people's heads. i left for sacramento at about 3:45 and felt bored for the entire drive. i got to my friend's wedding about four hours late. i ended up getting compliments from all of these fat people i could hardly recognize any more. all of my old friends got really fat and gross. i am dissapointed, but kind of feel good because they were really nice and some of the ones that were at one point really hot flirted with me. i am disgusted because the one i thought could never get any fatter gained like seventy pounds at least. her belly hung down over her crotch. weird looking for sure, especially in tight clothes. so now i am about to pick up one of my favorite friends and hang out with her. today has been a long day, but not as long as yesterday. yesterday was 24 hours. i get to work so early in the morning. not fun.